The Husband Wins

As usual, the Next Wife takes the brunt of all that is evil in divorce.  At least in my husband's case this is the truth.  If you follow my story you are familiar with Scarlett and her two children that seem to have taken her point of view more and more as they have gotten older.  We (me and husband) gifted the children a room makeover.  When one child left her things strewn along the house, including a "journal", it fell on me to try and get it all organized and put things away so we could get the move finished.  I did not expect to be stabbed in the back, stabbed in the heart again and then kicked in the face.

A book.   One book.  I picked up this book and flipped pages to see what it was.  What I saw made me sick to my stomach, a paragraph of writing that changed my life.  I read that the younger had gone through my entire room - so much for privacy.  Not only that but she read MY journal and then went on to misinterpret it (I went and located what she read and I never said what she said I did, even asked the husband if he wanted to read it) then write that she hates my "fucked up ass".  Hmm.  Sent it to husband.  Rightly he was upset, but not for the reason I expected.

He was upset his little girl wasn't as sweet as he thought.  His girl was not as honest as he hoped.  His girl was not the ultra good person he wanted her to be.  It had nothing to do with the fact that she violated my trust AGAIN.  Nothing to do with the fact that while I sign her up for all her activities (and I mean ALL of them) and pay for them from the account with MY name on them, get her everywhere on time, go to all of her away games/tournaments (more than either bio parent individually) and do the volunteer work for school and activities and she still shits all over me.

No repercussion for her.  No penalty.  Nothing.  Way to stand up for me, and thank you by the way.  I raised your kids for you while you worked.  I was the bad guy, I did the discipline, I did the homework, I did the chore enforcement.  What a fucking idiot.  Me, not you.  I was a total idiot, I let both the bio dad and the bio mom rail me into being their patsy.  Genius.

So now the husband is still the good guy.  Going to let the older go off on a trip she didn't earn even though that was the "deal" they made.  I've never seen an enforcement before and I know that since I haven't heard squat about the "deal" it likely is loose and fast so she can go no matter what because he thinks it is a "good experience".  The good experience would be to learn how to earn something and that there are consequences to one's actions.

I'm the bad guy for everyone, including his own mother.  What a genius play by him.

Now that I don't do it all, he missed having a party for a major birthday for his child because I didn't organize it.  He missed an honor roll presentation because I didn't remind him.  He didn't do something "meaningful" for a milestone because I didn't do it.  Scary for me is, he doesn't know he is missing everything and it makes me sad.

But he wins.  I'm the bad guy.  He is the nice guy.